I had a moment the other day. Just a random blip as I caught myself casually resting my hand on my belly. I saw a flash of a newborn baby in front of my eyes, cooing and kicking, and I was kissing its belly. And suddenly this little human growing inside of me seemed so intensely real. Up until a few days ago, this pregnancy had seemed so far away- like it was happening to a clone. Me but somehow not me. It was like I was watching it from the outside. And I have to admit, this feeling of detachment felt strange and lonely.
But in an instant, we connected, this baby and I. No longer a vague sense of life, but a son or daughter. My little superhero or my bity ballerina. A baby and I cannot wait to hold and meet. This unexpected connection hit me like a ton of bricks. I smiled and laughed and jiggled my ever-growing belly as if it were an introductory handshake.
"Hello, baby! Nice to meet you!" ;)
I am 99.9% convinced that I am carrying a girl and I could be 99.9% wrong about that. But whatever this baby is, it is already ridiculously loved and eagerly awaited.
As you can tell, I am really looking pregnant these days. I'm generally feeling pretty good, although there are still times when I'm sleepy in the afternoon especially after lunch and dinner.
Dear Baby,
You're now about the size of an apple!
This week you’ve started to breathe. Well kind of. You obviously aren’t breathing air yet, but you are moving amniotic fluid in and out of your lungs as if you were breathing. Your body is covered is a fine hair they call Lanugo. It looks a little weird, but they say it all falls out after you are born anyway.
And you’re growing. It’s definitely noticeable now! It’s weird to look down and only see my belly.
Love,
MOmmy.
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